Just some more thoughts

I am wondering if there are any couples out there, on this board, who have successfully surmounted and managed to get past problems of this nature?

If so, I would be so grateful to hear about the process you went through to get there.

I honestly don’t want to divorce. I have two small children, and I do love my husband. I want to make things work. I want him to want it to work.

What I feel, right now, is a kind of paralysis. I don’t want to bring up these issues with him right now, this weekend, but I did send him two very calm and clear emails (to his work email) stating how I feel and what I feel is necessary for us to get back on track.

I’m praying a lot right now, too. Many many thanks, again, for all your responses and feedback. It helps.

Depends on what you mean by success. I give or send emails to my husband all the time and he acts calm – even happy. Then I wake up one day and am told he doesn’t like to come home to me and I am controlling his life. These guys don’t think that straight. And they do not like to feel “pussy” whipped or controlled. They don’t want or respect your opinion – this was confirmed in my case a few days ago. He’ll either start changing or you will start hating or both.

I don’t believe I said all men were like that. In a few of my emails I went out of my way to say both women and men can be abusive. But this woman lives with an abusive man and she needs advice and help. And part of what she needs is to recognize he is abusive and dangerous and he is not going to respect her input – not for very long anyway.

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