If you really love this guy and want to make it work, he is also going to have to step up to the plate. If this means living on Mac and cheese for a time, so be it. Counseling should be an option, and heck yes, I’d speak with mom and dad. They I am sure, would not want you to be used in this manner at all.
The thing is….I DO love him and I DO want things to work out for ourselves and for our family as a whole.
I spoke (briefly) this morning with my parents, just to let them know what is going on, not for assistance, certainly, since this is our mess to clean up.
I’m just so tired of pretending that everything is o.k.. I also shared the situation with a CSW who handles some of my (autistic) son’s stuff (we get reimbursement for diapers up to $100. a month since we haven’t been able to toilet train him yet and he’s six but operating at a one-year level).
I agree that counseling would be a good idea, marriage as well as financial counseling.
After we got married I tried to sit down with him and work out a budget, but he wasn’t interested (similar issues with going to the Dr. / Dentist…..I see my GP & OB/Gyn once a year and dentist twice a year but, in seven years, I haven’t been able to get him to go to the Dr. for an exam or a PSA test — he’s 46).
MMI, by the way, say they will charge $90.00 to take on his case.
How do I get him motivated to do the things I feel he must do in order to do what is in the best interest of our family? I just don’t know. I talk and talk and it is like I am talking to a wall. He says that he understands how I feel. That’s it.
I feel so angry/confused/despairing right now.
Thanks for your comments. They DO help me…..I am just having trouble sorting all of this through my mind and trying to figure out how I can do damage control.